


Honey, You Know I Talk Too Much

by fandomworshipper



Series: Brotzly One Shots [2]
Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: Cute, First Kiss, Fluff, Getting Together, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pararibulitis (Dirk Gently), Pining, Song Lyrics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-07
Updated: 2018-04-07
Packaged: 2019-04-19 21:18:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14245956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fandomworshipper/pseuds/fandomworshipper
Summary: Imagine Dirk casually singing Talk Too Much - a song he heard on the radio. Todd gets flustered whenever Dirk sings it.Bonus: Dirk knows that Todd gets flustered, which is exactly why he’s always singing the chorus around him.(‘You know I talk too much,Honey, come put your lips on mine and shut me up’)((From //brotzlyprompts on tumblr - I love them go check them out





	Honey, You Know I Talk Too Much

**Author's Note:**

> ((Hey I’m bored and I actUALLY LOVE THAT SONG SO MUCH SO WOW heck imma write this)) A/n- if you don’t know the song, it’s acTUALLY AMAZING HHHNNNGGGG would recommend 17/10. Also yes I’m aware the title is a misquote, I just thought it was rOmANTiC

 

Todd pushed open the door to his apartment with his foot, balancing his shopping carefully in his arms. He opened his mouth and drew in a breath to call out to Dirk, who he knew would be there at that time.

But the words died in his throat, as he heard a soft murmur coming from the kitchen, accompanied by a sizzling sound.

He put the bags carefully on the coffee table and walked noiselessly to the opening where the kitchen began.

Dirk was stood there, his back to Todd, and he was singing. He was also cooking, which was both heart-warming and worrying at the same time - his cooking was… ‘experimental’ at the best if times - but that was pushed to the back of Todd’s mind.

Dirk’s voice, even at its current barely-there volume, was _beautiful._ Hypnotic.

Todd’s lips parted slightly and he tried to decipher what Dirk was singing.

‘You know my type, tightrope across the table,’ his volume had increased a little and he hummed out an 'mmhmm’, before muttering 'uh huh, I can’t keep holding my breath…’

It took Todd until Dirk was at 'I never leave it unsaid. Why can’t I leave it unsaid?’ To realise what the song was.

_Shit._

He didn’t know why but in the split second between lines, he decided he wasn’t even going to _risk_ letting himself hear Dirk sing _that._

'You know I-’

'Hi Dirk,’ he burst out, face hot and a flush rising on his neck.

Dirk spun around. 'Todd! I was just cooking for us! How does katsu curry sound?’

Todd let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. 'Um, it sounds… How far are you through it? I’ll help.’

'Only just started, really. I’m not very good at cooking,’ he laughed.

Todd smiled and began scanning his eyes over the recipe open on the worktop.

But apparently, Dirk had no shame.

'You know I talk too much,’

Todd breathed a shaky breath.

'Honey, come put your lips on mine and shut me up-’

'I- me- I’m- oh! Is that someone knocking?’ Todd all but vomited out, spinning on his heel and making a beeline for the door.

His face was hot, too hot, and he just knew if he’d stayed in there Dirk would have seen his flushed cheeks, his widened eyes, his lip slip between his teeth. He wrenched the door open, and stuck his head out.

'Is it anyone?’ Dirk called, oblivious, as always.

Still leaning out into the corridor, Todd let his head loll forwards. 'No. I’m- tired, can I go straight to bed?’

'Why, of course! Will you be wanting any curry? I can make enough for leftovers too if you want,’ Dirk outright grinned at him, innocence plain to see in his eyes. He had no idea. And damn him and his sweet, kind, thoughtful ways - even if his cooking was ultimately awful; he was really trying to be a good friend.

Todd mulled the word over in his head. 'Friend’. Dirk was his friend… Right? Well, of course, but did he… Want Dirk to be… More?

'You’ve been stood like that for an awfully long time, are you alright? Are you exhausted from the days work? Or… Or did you have an attack recently or something? It’s only seven, I’m surprised you’re tired, honestly, you’re normally up later than me! Are you ill? Do you need any-’

'No, I’m fine. No attacks, and I’m not ill, I’m just tired. Yeah. From… Work,’ Todd said quietly, smiling despite himself at how damn much Dirk _cared._

—-

The next time it happened, Todd was definitely not in the right state of mind to deal with it. Not that Dirk knew, of course.

Todd was shaking from the aftershock of an attack, tears drying on his cheeks, pills littered on the floor like morbid confetti, when Dirk burst through the door, hair messy from sleep, eyes hooded but alert.

'Todd! Todd! Bloody hell- I had a hunch, wow, are you okai?!’ He babbled, rushing over and kneeling in front of him.

 _Of fucking course Dirk Gently, king of being the most ridiculously thoughtful person in the entire world, had gotten up at_ two-thirty in the morning _because of a hunch that I wasn’t okai_ , Todd thought, and this just brought on a new wave of tears.

He hiccuped. 'Hug me, please,’ he blubbed, not even thinking.

Unsurprisingly, without hesitation, Dirk’s arms were suddenly around him. He sank down in front of Todd, and Todd pressed his blurred eyes into Dirk’s shoulder.

Dirk smelt of flowers and a sweet scent, almost like lemon drops or peaches, an aroma that, in the year Todd had known him, he had never been able to place. Todd breathed in the mix, the familiarity smoothing out the jumps in his breathing, ironing over the creases on his forehead.

Then, ever so gently, Dirk began to hum. Todd melted even more into his embrace, the tune barely registering in his mind. All that he felt for a few precious moments were the deep vibrations in Dirk’s throat and the steady pulse of his heart beating softly on Todd’s cheek.

Through some of the humming, Dirk would mutter lyrics.

'You read my mind… Better to leave it unsaid… Why can’t I leave it unsaid.’

The colour drained from Todd’s face.

'You know I talk too much,’

And in one rush, the blood returned, having brought seemingly all of it the rest from his body with it.

'Honey, come put your lips on mine, and shut me up.’

His muscles tensed, and he buried his flustered expression further into Dirk’s pyjama shirt. _I will in a minute,_ he thought to himself, but this made his cheeks infinitely, _impossibly_ redder.

 _No, no you will not,_ he chided himself. By this point, Todd had all but given up arguing with himself about it. _It,_ of course, being his huge, irritating, inconvenient and just downright humiliatingly obvious crush on the holistic detective.

Dirk was just so… Loveable. Too kind, too soft, _so soft…_

He muttered 'snap out of it, Todd’ and he swore he heard a snicker from above him, but when he lifted his rubescent face, Dirk’s face was still stoic, only his mouth was moving, muttering the lyrics to _Talk Too Much._ In the past week, Dirk had been singing that seemingly at every opportunity. Todd would blush every time, but surely Dirk hadn’t noticed…?

A thought struck Todd.

'Dirk?’

'Mm?’ He hummed in a gap between lines.

'Are you doing it on purpose?’

Dirk’s eyes widened, and Todd felt his chest tighten against his cheek. Then, as suddenly as the reaction had come, his body loosened again, his eyes relaxing. 'Doing what, Todd?’

Todd sighed. 'Doesn’t matter, never mind.’

—-

'Do you want anything?’ Todd stood on his tiptoes leant over the back of the sofa on his elbows, waving a takeaway menu. Dirk’s head flopped backwards to look at him.

'That would be splendid,’ he beamed, 'You pick for me though - I wouldn’t want to waste my money, I always take more than I can eat.’

'Your money?’ Todd scoffed indignantly. Dirk’s money? No! It was his money! 'We don’t share a bank account, Dirk, the money’s-’

'No, Todd. I’m paying for it.’

Todd stopped short. 'Oh.’ He looked at Dirk’s smiling face, 'but-’

'Nope. No buts.’

Sighing, Todd gave in. 'Fine. But I’m paying for the next one.’

Dirk clapped his hands together happily and swung his legs over so he was lounging on the sofa, but there was enough space for Todd if he sat, long-ways, in the same fashion.

Resigned, Todd sat down in this way, and called up the Chinese takeaway. 'Hello?’

Dirk was muttering something.

'Hello? Oh, hi, um, delivery please? Yes, pay at the door. Mhm-’ Todd’s conversation with the waiter was interrupted by his own small intake of breath as, yet again, he realised Dirk was singing _that._

'We can blame it all on human nature. Stay cool, it’s just a kiss, oh why you gotta be so talkative.’

The person at the other end snapped impatiently, and, cheeks hot and breathing uneven, he recited their order, thanked them, and hung up.

He flicked his eyes up.

'Hey Dirk?’

'Yes Todd?’

He took a breath. 'Listen… That song…’

Instantaneously, both men’s cheeks were dusted pink.

'I- I don’t know what you’re talking about-’

'You’re not that subtle.’

Dirk huffed. 'I have nothing to hide. I don’t know what song you mean. And I am most certainly doing nothing, at all, on purpose.’

—-

Later that evening, once the food had arrived and they’d settled themselves back down on the sofa in almost the exact same position as before, Dirk began again. They’d both finished, and the moment he started to sing, their eyes locked. But, to Todd’s surprise, Dirk kept going.

'Red velvet under pressure.’

Todd squinted his eyes, fighting the oncoming blush.

'Blah blah, green eyes.’

Despite his best efforts, he was definitely losing his grip on his resolve.

'I never leave it unsaid. Why can’t I leave it unsaid?’

Todd bit his lip.

'You know I talk too much,’ Dirk’s voice was low and sultry, something Todd hadn’t expected at all.

He braced himself for the next line, watching as Dirk’s blue, _blue_ eyes narrowed ever so slightly. God, his eyes, his gaze, his lips, his pink, soft lips…

'Honey, come put your lips on mine and shut me up-’

Dirk didn’t get any further: Todd’s lips were in the way. But honestly, he wasn’t complaining.

'You knew, you knew what you were doing,’ Todd muttered between desperate kisses.

Dirk flushed and pulled back slightly to mutter 'I may have had some idea what effect it was having on you,’ before surging forwards again to capture Todd’s lips again.

 _God, I’m so glad I didn’t think just now,_ Todd thought.

A few minutes later, Dirk brought them to a halt, pulling away with one last chaste kiss to the corner of Todd’s mouth.

'This is going to be rather random, but I’m rather fond of you. Um, really, _really_ fond of you,’ Dirk smiled shyly, face crimson.

'You know, Dirk, if that’s your way of saying that you love me, then just know I love you too,’ Todd whispered, 'but, you know, I think that song fits you pretty well. You definitely do too much talking and not enough kissing me.’

Dirk grinned bashfully. 'Well, I can fix that. We have plenty of time.’

—-

The next morning, Farah found them, light creeping in through the window timidly, softly drifting across their faces, sprawled out on the sofa, Todd on top of Dirk. In their sleeping state, they were smiling slightly, inches apart, and their fingers were locked together. Farah smiled and left, closing the door noiselessly behind her.


End file.
